Thursday 31 December 2009

Well, that was the year that was...

Well!

What can I say about it really?

Good bits - getting out of the comfort zone with a 2-stone weightloss, first 10k run, first and last firewalk, and a very brief appearance in a falconry display.

Add Faye and Kevin's wedding, and the look on Tyler's face as he held his first guitar, and there are a few nice memories there.

I could also add the joys of wind-up penguin racing on Christmas Day, but there was a blatant case of race fixing (Kev, hang your head in SHAME). Here's the starting lineup;



There are loads of others too, but I am currently suffering self-inflicted chocolate overload, which isn't helping my memory at all. Clearly need detox and a nap.

On the massive downside, I didn't get to share any of them with my mum.

So to move life on a bit, I have already formulated a load of plans that will never see the light of day, and dispatched them with the list of resolutions I resolutely refuse to make.

2010 will be just fine.

Thursday 29 October 2009

Cyprus Wedding

This went surprisingly well :)

Tuesday 13 October: had to send pets to bootcamp, in a lovely but remote kennels. 3 cats, 1 dog, and a dirt track that had abandoned 4-wheel drives along it. Not Chelsea tractors either, but real working Land Rovers! The Yardis is still in shock. Packing was horrendous, and I didn't get to bed at all.

Wednesday 14 October: Tyler and Phoebe were brilliantly behaved on the flight. At Nissi Beach, the Big Sis took a complete dislike to our rooms and lodged a strong suggestion they should move us. My room was fine, but the downside of beautiful mature trees is the lack of light they cause. They also hid the karaoke bar opposite, but they didn't really help the soundproofing. The kids were in a fantastic beach bungalow, beach 100 yards from front door.

Hit Ayia Napa for the hen night, which I left after the drinking game but before the karaoke. Was excused as at this point I'd been awake for 40 hours so had proved I could last the course. And the drinks were overpriced and watered down, not really worth staying for!

Thursday 15 October:
did some exploring of Nissi Beach and Ayia Napa, which is beautiful out of season. Sun, sand and sheer laziness. Perfect. Throw in the superb burgers at the Pool bar and the booze, heaven.

I also found out that there were many cats in the hotel grounds, and the grounds of the adjoining pubs and restaurants. Sleek, shiny and wary, they live happily on the local furry creatures and treats from the guests, with minimal intervention from the owners. They are not pets; they are highly effective pest control.

Friday 16 October:
beautiful day, beautiful venue, and the bride & groom scrubbed up quite well too! I was entrusted with a nice digital SLR, which means that Douglas has all my photos. He'll know which ones are mine, the crap ones.

My brother made a brilliant speech, so proud of him. He nearly cried when he mentioned Mum, and Kev's grandad Fred. Diane (Kev's mum) was so glad he'd mentioned Fred, as I think that sometimes people forget that strong capable mums are still someone's baby, and she was missing her dad. We've all been honest with each other about how we feel about Rosie; I think Diane had been doing the brave face thing too well.

Several members of the party ended up on the beach, some ended up in the water but no one drowned. Our venue closed at one, so it was across the road to the karaoke bar! Those formally dressed got changed for the occasion, I'm pleased to say. My brother and Rod, father of the groom, will appear on YouTube at some point with their rendition of 'You're 16', an age either has seen in 40 years.

Saturday 17 October-Tuesday 20 October: Sun, sand, food, more sun, and so on...great!

I tried quadbiking but gave up after 10 minutes. It was too much like hard labour.

Wednesday 21 October: our plans to live feral in the grounds with the hotel cats were discovered and we were dispatched to the airport pronto. Damn.

Thursday 22 October: Eric had enjoyed his stay at the cattery so much, he refused to leave. That is the BEST endorsement anyone could give! But he was caught in the end, and the scratches have nearly faded.

Friday 2 October 2009

Wedding prep and all that.

Yes, I've booked the flights.
Yes, I've printed copies of everything for everyone (including a 2-year old, who can't read).
Yes, hotel and transfers booked.
Yes, I've got travel insurance and,
Yes, I've checked it includes quadbikes (!)
Yes, I know where my passport and EHIC card are, and neither is due to expire.
Yes, I've got a dress that the bride should like (I like hers, she can be nice about mine or I'll wreck her wedding video).
Yes, the pets are innoculated and booked in an appropriately luxurious kennel.
Yes, I've booked the time off work and know what deadlines I have to finish before I go.
Yes, I know I need currency and I will get it sorted, ok?



But I'm still sure I've forgotten something.

Bugger.

Tuesday 29 September 2009

Go Team Tootill - AND WE DID

Saturday morning, 10.30am, Tatton Park.

1600 runners (or or 1590 runners and 10 members of Team Tootill) set off round the course. We even had a team logo, thanks to our mate Pete in Graphic Support Workshop. Check it out here

And I don't know how many finished, but WE DID!










Fastest Team Tootill-pootler was Steve at 52mins 30s.

I got round in 1 hour 25, according to the DJ. So did Lisa Frowny Baby, but she did wait for me so could've crossed about 5 minutes earlier. Jolan paid the price for getting stuck in jogging traffic and finished just behind.

Our Janey McN was the last over the line, so at the goading of the DJ we legged it back and crossed the line with her. Have a sneaky peek at the Running Pictures website Our bib numbers were in the 801-900 group. Be warned this page takes forwever to download.

And we've earned a shitload of cash for Cancer Research UK, thanks to our very supportive and generous mates :)

Tuesday 8 September 2009

Phoebe Jane is 1 on Friday!

Our little Phoebe is nearly a year old.

I really think she should have been born on the 10th, the day they switched on the Large Hadron Collider for the first time. With bets taken on which would destroy the Universe first ;)

Instead she choose 11th September 2008 (that's 11/9 in the UK NOT 9/11 which is four days after Guy Fawkes as any fule kno). Which means I've got til Thursday pm to find a present.

Her mum has suggested I find some kind of funky bib/jacket thingy - Phoebe is enthusiastic about feeding herself, and both she and Tyler are going to graduate to proper paints soon. Covering the house top-to-toe is a bit extreme but covering the child is eminently practical.

I feel I should really find another present too. But I really need to find something robust and interesting to the child. She seems to have a penchant for her brother's toolkit, but I haven't found a girly-ish one, yet. It needs to look different to Ty's or there will be a real scrap.

I've found a fully-functioning adult's toolbox in pink, apparently real girls can't do DIY unless they have a pink screwdriver! So I ask, is it inappropriate to give a year-old child a real toolkit?
She's very bright for her age...

Friday 14 August 2009

We're back! Sort of...

Well, since the last post;

* I've been to the Cambridge Folk Festival (check link down the side as I couldn't be arsed taking photos)

* Tyler is now 2 years old, he's got the tantrums down to perfection as he's been practising for Terrible Twos since Christmas

* Phoebe the Red-Haired Wonderkid has graduated to her first pair of shoes, and chose the bright purple shiny ones (that's my girl!)

* Bailey is still my personal trainer, although I will be doing the "10k stagger round and try not to have a heart attack" not the 10k run for Team Tootill

* My friends Lisa (Frowny Baby) and Jolan have offered to join me on the run. Stars, both of them. *especially if they carry me over the finish line

* The cats have launched a hate campaign against my sister, for tidying up the garden. To be fair she did decimate it, and the skip was not a suitable replacement

* I passed the Level 1 Deafblind Communication exam I took back in May, despite falling asleep in the final presentation with all the exam info in.

* As the child of a mixed marriage - Salford MUFC mum and Miles Platting MCFC dad - I am watching the pre-season shennanigans with great interest and no conflict whatsoever. I want them in the top two positions, with everyone else playing for 3rd place. No pressure there, lads.

And the lovely Elegant Eric was caught having a mad moment this morning! Chasing about like a true mad thing, not his usual cool self. But he's not daft - he waited until I was just about to leave for work, and couldn't film it. He's really missed Mum, so it was nice to see him perking up a bit.

We are all getting back to normal, slowly.

Monday 20 July 2009

Bare faced cheek

To keep it brief:

A colleague in another department clashed with his boss.

This woman had been promoted beyond her level of ability - the promotion put her in charge of a department where she had no experience, and it was very tekkie so her transferable skills couldn't save her.

She and my well-qualified and experienced Colleague were on a collision course from day 1. After yet another meeting where she failed to delegate, and interferred to a point where she became dangerous, Colleague decided to quit. He was old enough to qualify for early retirement, so he took this option to get his well earned benefits.

We were out at lunchtime for his presentation.

She had made his life hell, and yet stood there and praised him in the way you would praise an elderly dog for not peeing on the carpet.

He is 56 and brilliant at his job, much missed by his colleagues.

She is now the target for a lot of revulsion and sarcastic comments.

I am wondering how this is going to pan out. His friends are talented, creative and seriously pissed off. I'm hoping their creative natures will construct some witty and extravagant revenge.

But in case that fails, they can have the box of weedkiller powder I found in the shed.

Friday 10 July 2009

Go Team Tootill!

Our friend and colleague has been diagnosed with breast cancer.

She's getting the appropriate treatment, but we all decided that something should be done to fundraise for cancer research.

So what do a bunch of hard-drinking exercise-dodgers choose to do?

A 10k fun run, that's what....

So check us out at Team Tootill, http://www.run10ksponsorme.org/teamtootill!

She likes cats. Therefore a good sort!

Friday 29 May 2009

Pigeon

My cats decided to have a friend round for Eurovision.

I was out, watching Manchester United win the Premiership, then off to dinner with my sister and cousin. So they figured it was safe.

I got home just in time to watch the voting, and settled down after closing the blinds. The pets were acting weird, nothing new there.

About 30 minutes into the voting, I noticed a pigeon's foot sticking out through the blinds. At first I thought it was too much champagne, but no - there was a pigeon sat on my windowsill, trying to blend into the dark window. It was doing just fine until it stuck the foot out for better balance.

So the Pesky Critters were shooed into the kitchen, while I tried to persuade the pigeon to leave. After 5 minutes, it had a name (Duckworth) and demonstrated some lovely swooping techniques as it evaded me, followed by some terrific crashing techiques as it landed on any unsuitable perch it could find.

Meanwhile, three very angry cats and a Jack Russell were going ballistic in the hallway. The tone was "Catch your own ******* pigeon, he's ours!"

Duckworth made it clear he was not a nocturnal pigeon and had no intention of going out into the dark to find somewhere to roost. I put him in a cat basket in the bathroom, to wait for morning. He seemed happy enough with the water and birdfood. In fact, after I let him out of the bathroom window he flew off, came back and sat on the windowsill.

I think he just wanted to annoy the cats.

Thursday 14 May 2009

My mum

Sadly, Rosie died on 7 May 2009.

The operation for the colostomy uncovered a tumour, which turned out to be aggressive and cancerous.

She was admitted to a local hospice.

Dr Kershaws Hospice

We had hoped to bring her home, but it was not to be.

Her funeral was this afternoon, and we requested family flowers only, with donations to Dr Kershaws from anyone else. If we won the big prize on the lottery and gave it to them, we'd not come close to repaying their kindness to Rosie and us.

Thursday 30 April 2009

TV exposure guaranteed

Just perusing the latest offering from Mike Whalley's blog.

http://mikewhalley.wordpress.com/2009/04/26/last-on-motd-my-camera-never-lies/

Another way to get noticed at the game is this:

i) Get seats in the same area as the new and VERY unpopular owners of your team (two rows in front and one seat to the left worked well)
ii) Turn up suited and booted for a big game, to be shown on Sky.

Instantly you look like part of the new establishment, and may have your identity speculated about. OR, as happened, you are viewed as a henchman for those personally responsible for wrecking a good club, and get verbally abused all evening!!

I must point out that although I'm not massively fond of the two family fiends described above, I didn't join in. I wasn't there, and it is pointless throwing insults and prawn sandwiches at the tv.

Never get mayo on your own carpet...

* fiends is not a typo, remember I know these two. and cut-n-paste the blummin link, I couldn't get insert hyperlink to work

Monday 20 April 2009

Random warblings.

i) I have been enjoying the new F1 season.

I felt really sad that Honda were going to quit, and felt that Brawn GP might be filling the Back-Row-Minardi-Minardi role. Very happy to be proved wrong! I understand why Honda quit - and as the Lovely Kev now works for Honda, I felt pleased they were looking after the everyday concerns, and trying to avoid sacrificing too many ordinary jobs to keep the glamour side going. Lovely though Jensen Button is, he isn't marrying my niece in October! I know some have gone - but fingers crossed for Kev. Even if he is trying to sell me a pink Honda Jazz...

The BBC coverage of the event didn't show the driver's interview after, they felt Andrew Marr and Carol Thatcher were more important. And to think that they were supposed to be better than ITV!

ii) Phoebe had now progressed to the baby walker, and is loving her new wheels. Her brother has now progressed to putting his own shoes on, on the right feet, and we are hoping he can teach his father this new trick sometime soon.

iii) The Reservoir Mogs (Salford Posse) are all fine and well, while reports indicate that the Reservoir Mogs (Southern Chapter)and the Reservoir Mog (Gee Cross) are also fine and dandy.

iv) And me? Just pottering along, trying to make sense of stuff and rushing round like a maniac. I think I need a more booze-and-chocolate-fuelled life. Although I'm a stone lighter now, and the thought of smaller jeans is leading me away from the Krispy Creme and more towards the crisp salad. Who WOULD have thowt it?

Competitive critters

Now, how do you choose a winner out of this lot?

Mum was a leading contender. Stomach pains which turn out to be a mild blockage of the bowel, curable with a minor hernia operation. Right up to the point where they opened her up, found a very large and immovable tumour, and needed to perform an emergency colostomy. Followed by all sorts of medical intervention and she is still in hospital in a Catch-22; she can't leave until she gains weight, but can't/won't eat hospital food and is declining food parcels :(

Even by her standards, that is impressive Pesky Critter behaviour.

Bailey did try to give her a good run for her money, literally, by running away during a long walk. He ran off, in a strange area about 3 miles along the canal from home. Managed to get home in record time and to cross a 6-lane motorway & A-road junction. I was still running round the field off the canal bank, shouting like a lunatic and enrolling innocent passers-by in the search. All the while, the stumpy-legged git was heading for James's house, to have breakfast with the kids!

I called him lots of names, I don't recall Pesky Critter being one of them.

The worrying thought is this; the cats are very competitve. They have seen the bar set high, and may well fancy their chances.

Friday 3 April 2009

Not welcome in my own home.

The pests - sorry, PETS - are getting out of hand.

As Mum is still in hospital and I work full-time, I'm not home as much as I would like. At first, as the only human tin-opener, I commanded some respect. But they have all developed a taste for dry food and sleeping on the bed, which means I am useful in the morning and a waste of space at any other point.

My insistence on claiming bedspace and sitting on the furniture has become an unbearable problem to them. If they could find a human trainer to take me in hand, they would.

Thankfully they lack independent wealth and the ability to use Google.

Thursday 26 March 2009

Bit of an absence...

but did it make the heart grow fonder?

I would like to say that the gap coincided with a period of peace and tranquility.

Not a bloody hope! My mother has been hospitalised since Friday 13th.

The cats think this is highly suspicious, and as I left with her and the paramedics, clearly it is MY FAULT.

Bailey didn't get away unscathed either as he was accidentally shut in the room.

So the dog and I are prime suspects and the cats are not going to rest until we are brought to book for it.

Rosie is currently enduring a soujourn in a local hospital, but there is still a fair bit of driving to be done after work. This means I can hide from the vengeful moggies, in my workplace or my car. Bailey, however, is not allowed in the workplace and is afraid of cars, and can't be left in a car park during visiting. He is alone to cop the flak.

Poor little hound...if you want to donate chewy sticks to compensate for this dreadful existence, leave an e-mail address and we'll sort something.

Saturday 28 February 2009

Goodbye Gromit

Sadly, we had to have Gromit put down on Friday night.

He was 13 years old, and considering he was a psychopathic monster eating at the Last Chance chewy-stick bowl when we rescued him, he did alright in the end.

He leaves behind a miserable Tigger, and a worried (outnumbered) Bailey.

Eric and Jasmine were unavailable for comment but it sounded like the cat equivalent of 'One down, one to go'.

Tuesday 24 February 2009

Essential telly!

I have become a sad geeky fan of Being Human.

I love it to bits! To the point where I am fretting about the characters, and pacing about for the final episode.

I know there can't be happy endings, but can the werewolf and his girlfriend be happy and have little werecubs?? Why can't Annie haunt her repulsive boyfriend to a horrible death?? And must the vampire go??

I can see that being most unpopular with the female demographic...

Sunday 15 February 2009

Friday the 13th.

Strangely, this is the day I showed a little commonsense.

Unlucky for some? I'll find out tomorrow when I go back into work tomorrow. But on Friday I hauled my sorry arse into work, despite feeling ill.

As I slumped onto the chair I realised how stupid and selfish I was being. Neet has just become an auntie, but the newest addition is early and currently in a neo-natal unit. So I said my goodbyes, resisted the urge to puke on my boss's shoes * and went home.

Typically, I started the flu max treatment from the wrong end of the pack, and took the night-time tablets at 10am. Great dreams in a disturbed sleep! Woke up properly at 4.30pm, with nightmare memories of horrific wedding proposals...

"Do you know why you are in this heart -shaped tv set?"
"Dunno, have we won a car?"
"No, you are here to propose to Glenda, your long-suffering girlfriend of 19 years. On national tv. And the Bridget Jones Supporters Club will kick the crap out of you if you don't."
"Could I have the car instead?"


The only good thing in this was the fact that, on Friday 13th, they normally like the horror stories. With a plane crash and Australia in flames to add to the usual death and despair, this would have been tasteless beyond belief.

* the puking on the shoes thing wasn't strictly a symptom, I just don't get on with my boss at the moment!

Saturday 7 February 2009

Work and all that

The students decided to get all political this week and staged a sit-in at our main building on Wednesday. A surefire way to get Israel out of Gaza, apparently.

By Friday it was decided that a couple of the surrounding buildings had to close, for safety reasons. Which in turn meant that one of my colleagues had to have a half day off, her husband works in an affected building which closed at 12.30pm Friday, and she's pregnant! So by her twisted logic, she had to go too.

Don't get all sympathetic, she's only 4 months on and lives a very short bus ride away, she didn't need a lift in a 4x4 to get through the snowdrifts around a rural retreat. I'm just pissed that she expects us all to believe she's a fragile flower, instead of a blagger after a long weekend. That, I COULD respect!

The secondment girl found out it was kicking off in her old building, so set up a hotline to Steve-the-font-of-all-knowledge. In their building, someone tried to force their way into the 1st floor admin offices (swipecard protected). They tried to push in past an irate technician who gave them a slap and shoved them back out. She's not a girl to be messed with! In turn, that led to a stampede of 3rd floor administrators, fearing for their lives and their filing systems.

We spent the rest of the afternoon trying to lure them into our building. Nice cafe, fully stocked chocolate machines and we would have thrown in some of our complimentary biscuits too - what not to like for a siege venue??

They turned us down :( AND we have cult building status, we were used in Life on Mars, I'll have you know!

Bloody students....

Monday 2 February 2009

Countdown to the Cyprus Wedding

We've started to look at accommodation and flights.

We've had a sneak preview of the wedding dress.

And I'm starting the panic-diet-and-gym-regime now, although the wedding is Friday 16 October.

Wayyyy-heyyyy! Now Faye and Kevin just have to go through with it... :)

Wednesday 7 January 2009

My pets are weird.

They are the only creatures on my road who are pleased that United Utilities are digging up the gas and water mains to selected properties.

For everyone else, this means disrupted gas and water supply. Yep, cold water if you are lucky and don't bet on that. Apparently all the nasty freezing cold and mucky stuff will start tomorrow.

For my barmy crew, it means a big muddy hole at the side of the house (oh joy of joys to a pair of scruffy terriers) and some visitors.

My mum has been brewing up for the workmen and letting them use the loo. My pets are lovely to strangers and only get stroppy with family. The workmen are so pleased to get decent tea and not use the portaloo, they have joined Bailey's fan club.

The cats have been keeping a sensible distance from the mud pit but it hasn't stopped them playing mind games with the dogs. The dogs can only get to the pit if they go out through the front door, they can't squeeze through the back gate into the passageway that is now Mudpit Central.

The cats can squeeze through the gate and make much of the fact. They do it too often to be coincidence; there is definite malicious intent.

Actually, Gromit is now very old and frail. Well, it sounds more sympathetic than nearly-past-it and scrawny. He probably could fit through, but Bailey the Barrel would never make it, and you've got to be loyal to your species, haven't you?

That is probably the real difference between cats and dogs; the cats wouldn't give a stuff if one couldn't join in, they work on majority rule.

I'll be going to the gym a lot more in the next week or so. At least I can get a shower there.

Monday 5 January 2009

Start off the New Year totally confused...

by the announcement of Matt Smith as Doctor Who.

Well, he's had a bit of spare time since they ended Granada Soccer Night last season, but isn't he a bit busy with The Championship on Sunday mornings? And what about the European games he's allowed to present, and the contract with ITV?

Can you be a footie presenter and a Time Lord at the same time? Some areas just don't lend themselves to that sort of crossover.

Wrong Matt Smith...

But they did choose to make the announcement on the same day as the FA Cup 3rd round ties. I had my mind on other things.